I open with e4, looking for a Smith-Morra or gambitty Scotch, and my opponent immediately reacts with g6. This was, in my opinion, the first losing move of the game. The move g6 is fine, but the fact that my opponent immediately played it led me to understand the key to destroying his embarrassing strategy. With this move, Black essentially took out a megaphone, turned it on, and screamed in my ear saying "I AM ABOUT TO PLAY THE SAME FOUR MOVES THAT I ALWAYS PLAY. DO WHATEVER YOU WANT. GOOD LUCK!"

Because hypermodern chess openings don't interact with the center of the board, players may feel that they do not need to react to their opponent's moves. After all, you can certainly fianchetto or move a pawn one square without fear of a capture. This is what I imagined that Black was thinking, and after taking a second or two to regain my composure, I formed a plan to educate him on his critical miscalculation.

I respond as White with a very principled 2. d4, unmasking my dark-squared bishop. After all, Black knelt down on his hands and knees and begged me to take control of the center with his opening. What kind of chess player would I be if I were to refuse his request? As anticipated, Black follows by fianchettoing his king's bishop.

A darkened smile creeps across my lips as I grasp my computer mouse, select my H pawn, and thrust Harry forward to h4. Yes, I think to myself. What will you do when my H pawn arrives at your doorstep on h6? Where will you go, O kingly bishop? Will you run back home to Mommy on f8? Or will you gallantly sacrifice yourself just to give yourself a few more moves before mate?

This is dubious play indeed. But, I posit that 3. h4 thrusts a pop quiz into the hands of the Hypermodernist chess player. The move h4 tests Black to see if he understands his ultimate goals and White's ultimate goals. With 3. h4, White surely intends on playing h5, and from there, the h6 threat looms. Black's response in this game is e6. A feeble choice. With this move, Black has created a new dark square weakness on f6. Stockfish 11 (depth 23) evaluates this position as +1.2. No exchanges have been made, but Black is already more than a pawn behind.

Do you understand now, Black? Do you understand that I am coming for you? I'm in your neighborhood, I'm crawling around your streets. Just seconds ago, you were blindly building a home on g8, nothing on your mind but the comfort and safety of your king. I'm threatening to shut down your golden bishop with e5. I'm going to make a permanent outpost on f6 with f4 and hop on into it with my queen's knight. You're going to have a new roommate, Black, and guess what - I'm not paying rent. Sure, you can look to exchange minor pieces. But just know that with each capture you initiate, you are only driving my thorny pawns closer to the heart of your kingside structure. Make your move Black. I'm waiting.

So this is your response? You're going to threaten a capture on d4 with your... queen? I laugh, knowing that my opponent is now lost in a deep, dark forest. A jungle where there is only one path of escape. There is only room for one of us along this path, you Hypermodernist. I clutch my mouse and hover over my chosen fighter, Harry the H pawn. "Harry," I say aloud. "It is now time you fully realize your destiny. It seemed like it would take a lifetime to get here only a minute ago. But now, it is time for you to claim your birthright. Take h6 and cast Black back into hell itself!"

Black cowardly retreats his bishop. Have you learned something here, opponent of mine? I've only touched three pawns, yet I am positionally crushing you. You are like a spider caught in its own web, just now realizing that you will suffocate in the very house that you created. "Learn from this lesson, Black," I beg. "Take the time to open your eight eyes and understand your opponent's intentions behind their moves."

I move my knight to f3, and Black he, - he responds with Nc6. Black... Black... you foolish fool. You truly have learned nothing today. I'm equal parts impressed and repulsed. Black, I pity you. I need you to understand... you can't just build the same old structure every chess game, even if you decide to sacrifice control of the center. Each chess game is as unique as every individual on Earth. Every game has a different background, a different story, different conflict, and a different resolution. Do you live your life by uttering the same five phrases to each person that you meet? Poor, poor Black. I truly wish we could take back our moves and start this game over, but I am terrified that Black would simply... play the exact same moves over and over and over. I grow pale, and my palms glisten with sweat. Individuals with such droll, quotidian realities, uttering the same mundane formalities, day in and day out... they haunt me. How can they be living such a false life? Life, by biological definition, must be able to react to external stimuli, right? A breathy, cold, dark question escapes from my lips. "Perhaps, I too may be playing the same moves over, and over again." Trapped in a never-ending Escher staircase, leading to no conclusion, no resolve. A bead of sweat falls from my forehead, into my coffee. I think of Sisyphus, bound by metal chain to perform the same impossible task every day. How can I... how do I break this cycle and set him free? I reach for my computer mouse with both hands.

Can you spot the winning continuation for White?

Hands shaking, I close my eyes and slowly drag my bishop to g5. A swift but powerful coup de grace, trapping Black's queen. Black hesitates for perhaps the first time in the game, and in those few seconds, I feel a connection, an understanding between the two of us. It is impossible to remove the bonds that chain Sisyphus, but yes, he can be set free. I imagine Black reaching for his king, his eyes locked onto mine. "Thank you," he says, before extending two fingers and flicking his king over onto the board, lifeless and cold. "Black," I whisper. "You finally understand. Today is the first day of your new life. Go, and let what transpired here today guide you. For I too have been lost in this deep dark forest, and I too have rolled that Sisyphean rock up that old hill. Now quickly - depart and begin your new life, loving deeply and forgiving easily!